La Vida es Buena

I have a lot to report on so you should probably grab a snack and a cocktail and get comfy.

So far 2016 has brought some great energy and experiences. I could probably ramble on for a few thousand words but you have lives to get back to so I’ll try to condense as much as possible.


 

Quick Thanks to Choose Hope Inc. for seeing Emily Nason sport their headband at the NOCC walk and reaching out to her. As a result of that they sent me a TON of merch and a beautiful handwritten card for encouragement. They are fantastic champions for cancer research and support so please check them out.

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Health Update:

Prior to departing for La República Dominicana, I received the BEST news that my CT scan was stable and one of the pelvic tumors had even reduced in size. It was like getting an elementary school report card with comments like “Your tumors have been very well behaved and much improved! Plays well with others.”

When I returned from vacation I had a routine check up with Dr. Robison. Much to my surprise she wanted to talk to me about next steps and potential treatment modification for the near future. So here is one possibility to consider:

-May-ish would mark the one year point of being on this treatment plan. She is going to scan me again around that time. If the scan is still stable (unchanged) or tumors are shrinking she is willing to let me make the decision to opt out of Taxol (the chemo part) and just do Avastin (the antibody) once every 3 weeks. That is an AMAZING prospect!

She is leaving this in my hands. We know Taxol works so if it would make me feel more secure to stay on it, that’s fine. From a quality of life perspective I’d be interested in testing the waters with just Avastin. If I become symptomatic again we can just throw me back on Taxol, no problem. She assured me that it would not impact Taxol’s ability to still work if I go off and on again if we needed to. Sounds pretty good to me! The next few months will be critical.

After this past scan I wasn’t even going to bother to ask about my CA-125 because I figured it would still be high. Sheila texted me today to let me know it went down from 785 to 723. What a pleasant surprise 🙂3478638


Vacation:

¡Ay dios mío! We had a REAL vacation! Cory and I spent the last week in Puerto Plata, Dominican Republic and it was 1000x better than I even imagined.

We initially hit a few snags. We had a flight from Providence to Newark that was delayed by several hours due to a mechanical issue. For that reason, we missed our connection in Newark to Puerto Plata and could not leave until the next day. After a lot of fighting with United Airlines (that had the most atrocious customer service) they begrudgingly sent us to Newark that day and put us up in the airport Ramada for the night with a couple food vouchers.

Thank GOODNESS I was with Cory who totally kept his cool because I was so frustrated with United I flew into a blind rage and had to walk away. To be clear, I have the true inability to “pop off” on others, especially people in service positions so “blind rage” translates to me hysterically crying and trying to pull it together crouched behind an ATM.

It wasn’t so much the disappointment about losing a day, it was truly the rude way in which we were spoken to and lack of problem solving on the part of United that drove me over the edge. The first woman we spoke to had an attiude that translated to “Well, not our fault. Go home.” Additionally, when I’m at the airport talking to United I should not have to CALL A CUSTOMER SERVICE NUMBER to resolve a problem only to be told that we shouldn’t be calling and need to talk to the ticket counter.

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On the flip side, Expedia’s customer service was unparalleled. I called while Cool-Calm-Collected-Cory dealt with United.

Expedia was totally apologetic and didn’t put the burden back on us. They not only called the resort for us but they also refunded us for the night we missed. They were unable to re-schedule our shuttle from the Puerto Plata airport to the resort so instead they gave us a $50 credit which was more then the value of the shuttle. After this experience I would 100% use Expedia again. Here’s to you Expedia-

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In a nutshell once we got there, the vacation was great. Our resort was small and had a nice community feel. We even made friends with a few of the other couples there. So I should thank Gabby, Alan, Nicole, Paul, Brian, Jen, Rob and Rachel for enhancing an already great experience (and being the best cheer section- explanation to come).

Highlights:

  • The fact that we asked of a king sized bed but were instead given two queens pushed together to form a MEGA BED! Sprawling commence! Cory hated it, I loved it.

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  • They also stocked the rooms with a gallon of water every day so people wouldn’t get sick from the tap water. Restaurants and bars also always had water from a jug, never from the tap.
  • Parasailing for the first time. How unreal! Incredible views of crystal clear ocean, mountains, and reefs. We were the only ones that went at that time so we had an extra long ride. I’d say we were in the air for at least 30 mins. I must do this again stat. I highly recommend the Seapro company for anyone visiting Playa Dorada in the near future.
  • Getting a $10 massage on the beach while I sipped on a piña colada and stared at the ocean.
  • Full day catamaran trip to two reefs in Sosúa for snorkling
    • Side note: It is the beginning of the whale migration! We not only spotted the first whale of the season but it came right up to our boat. It was like standing next to a school bus. Simply breathtaking.
    • Below are Cory and I soaking in the sun on the front netting of the catamaran on our return trip back to Playa Dorada:

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  • Sea kayaking (total redemption from my last attempt in Australia when Matty K and I capsized and nearly drowned)
  • Winning 2nd place and a bottle of rum in the Blue Bay Villas Doradas Ideal Couple Contest with Cory. Basically we were dragged on stage and had to do four “double dare” like challenges. It was a close race but we lost ever so slightly to a Slovenian couple. I thought we crushed it. I was also so happy to look into the audience and realize our new friends were all there cheering us on. Totally unlike Cory and I to do something like this but it was ridiculous and memorable for sure.

Yes, photos exist. Will I be posting them? Jury is still out on that one.

  • Our general routine of wake up, read a little and sip on a coffee by the spa pool, breakfast buffet (with our favorite waiter Rafael), beach time until 2 or 3ish, open air lunch, pool time/swim up bar/contests/activities around the pool until about 5:30, nap, dinner, show, bed. (So remind me again why we came home? Do advising positions exist in Puerto Plata? Surely they need a lighting salesman with all of those resorts. Hmm- Cory- let’s bone up on our Español and rethink our living arrangements…)

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  • The service as a whole- The Animación Crew (entertainment crew) was amazing. They constantly were hosting games, contests, dancing, and engaging all of the guests. Huge shout out to our boy Alfredo (the most enthusiastic dancer I’ve ever seen), Coca Cola, James Bond, Veronica, and Barbie. It felt nice that everyone from the entertainment crew to the servers to the bartenders got to know you personally.

Cory has at least 700 pictures/videos to sort through so unfortunately I don’t have many more to post right now but hopefully this will give you a little taste of the paradise we were so fortunate to experience over the past week.

I’m oozing with gratitude to be in a position to have this experience. I feel that my batteries are totally recharged, I am relaxed, and I am ready to take on the next few months.

¡Adios amigos y amigas!

 

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Centering mind & body with family & pie

I hope that everyone enjoyed their Thanksgiving holiday! Hopefully you did not have to rush off to work just yet (sorry Jacque! Retail is a buzz kill).

Thanksgiving this year was different than usual. Because I was scheduled to receive chemo the day after Thanksgiving, it would just be too much for me to drive back to Torrington and home again in 24 hours. Despite the gracious offer to join my cousins, my parents and I had a modified low-key Thanksgiving together on the Cape. We had a phenomenal four course traditional meal at the Daniel Webster Inn. Afterward, my mom and I whipped up a delicious apple pie and a loaf of banana bread using the secret family recipe. I have yet to eat banana bread that rivals my mother’s so it was nice to share this piece of our family history with her.

We ended the night with a marathon of Rummikub. To keep things interesting, I forced my parents to adopt silly rules and claimed them to be “new house rules”. This involved making by parents flap their arms like birds and yell “caw-caw, caw-caw!” whenever they had two tiles remaining.

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I adore my family and do not get to see them often as we are a bit spread out in a few states. As much as I would have liked to share this holiday with my extended family I think it was in my best interest to have a quiet break from life for a couple days in Mashpee. I was able to decompress and recenter myself. I can honestly say I feel much better than when I last wrote.

As I mentioned, today began yet another new cycle of chemo. I received both Taxol and Avastin. I am thrilled that W&I was able to fit me for an early afternoon infusion so that I did not have to rush back from the Cape early in the morning.

**Bonus** There was a therapy dog today! So many kisses and snuggles were had by all!

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Today I receive the updated CA-125. The numbers came back as just over 600, meaning it has doubled since the last reading. Considering the infection that I’ve been fending off, stress, and feeling rundown I am not at all surprised that my numbers shot up. That said, I’m not upset either (and no, this isn’t one of those times where I’m putting on a brave face but secretly sad on the inside. I’m very legitimately okay with this). I chalk this one up to a ‘not-great reading’ and hope that my body is in better condition for the next one.

In the interest of remaining focused on a more positive frame of mind, I want to share a gift from one of my students:

(I appreciate Kim providing me written consent to share her name as well as this gift with you.)

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Relay for Life 2015- Nelly (left), Kim (center), Me (right)

The context surrounding this gift is that before Kim became my advisee, we had crossed paths through Relay for Life and the Izzy Foundation. We bonded over our common experience of being young with cancer and that evolved into her joining my caseload in Advising. She is a stellar student and has a big heart for those around her. I can happily say that she is now cancer-free.

Through Kim, I met another wonderful girl named Nelly. Nelly was a patient at Hasbro with Kim and they became the best of friends under horrible circumstances. Nelly had been fighting Ewing Sarcoma but her suffering came to an end last weekend when she earned her angel wings.

Kim was the first to share the news with me and all weekend I worried about her. When someone close to you passes it is quite obviously devastating. When someone close to you passes of a disease you can relate to there are complex levels of emotion- fear, anger, mourning, survivor’s guilt, etc. It can be hard for some to process.

On Monday afternoon I returned from lunch to find a purple gift bag on my office chair. It contained a card and the framed picture above. Kim had written on every square inch of this card. It then dawned on me that while I was worried all weekend about her, she was also concerned for me.

Below is an excerpt from her card. It helped me to find perspective and I think it can speak to all of us on some level:

“I made this frame myself. There are many flaws and even some scratches, but they represent scars. When I first made this frame, it gave me issues, so I re-did part of it. I didn’t start new because I felt as though the scars (scratches) tell a story, just as all of our do. I kept it like this to show how perfection isn’t everything. Our lives are far from perfect, but we still manage to survive and get through every day.”

I think we can agree that my student is wise beyond her years. There are no accidents in life and this card arrived at a moment when I needed an influx of reminders that it’s okay not feel strong all the time. Beauty still exists within our imperfect worlds.

I consider myself so lucky to work with students with such heart. When people say to me: “I don’t know how you work through all of this!” I wish I could let them be flies on the wall for these kinds of moments packed with such genuine human connectedness.

So in short (HA! Right…) I feel that I am slowly returning to a more centered frame of mind. I am not currently feeling the stress and sadness that lingered over the past few days and I am getting excited for the weeks to come both in and out of work.

Cheers friends, have a happy and safe weekend!

ENJOY ALL OF THOSE LEFTOVER TREATS!

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Three Years

About 20 days ago I posted a letter to myself in the form of ‘Dear Former Self’. It was an emotionally charged tribute to success in light of illness caught at a moment when I actually felt like I had my shit together. I meant every word of it and I am glad that ’20 days ago’ Jessica wrote it because ‘today Jessica’ really needed a reminder.

Today marks exactly three years since the diagnosis that re-charted my future. I can and do frame this anniversary as a celebration of life and thriving in spite of adversity. Honestly though, ‘today Jessica’ and ‘yesterday Jessica’, and ‘day before that Jessica’ are feeling pretty run down. Exacerbated by another week of chemo and an antibiotic in my system, I feel weak and worn out. My body aches, I’m exhausted, and my stomach is torn to shreds. Moreover, strong emotions float to the surface of my mind.

I left work a little early, curled up with my favorite blankets and watched a mind-numbing amount of Netflix. It turns out this was the best decision I could have made to honor myself today.

 

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(My friend Kerri emailed this to me at work today and it couldn’t have been more well timed)

If I try to pull myself up by my bootstraps any harder I’m going to put my entire foot through the sole. So today, I take the advice of my parents, Cory, my friends, co-workers (and all of the other highly perceptive people that have nudged me to be kinder to myself).

On this third anniversary I do three things:

1.) Re-read ‘Dear former self’ and pat myself on the back for making it this far in spite of crummy circumstances.

2.) Allow myself to be sad (for now). This disease has a thousand silver linings but actually replaying delivery of diagnosis in my mind is incredibly painful and can be difficult to ignore. If only I could use ‘chemo brain’ to selectively forget that moment.

3.) I rest. I shut off my work email, silence my phone, and just allow my body to be still and comfortable. It is working on overdrive to fight the disease and super-overdrive to keep up with the unfair demands I put on it constantly.


 

On a final note, I cannot thank everyone enough that has stood by me over a long three year period of highs and lows. Through the fear, successes, disappointment, and hopeful moments I have never once felt truly alone. I thank you for every pep talk, prayer, or kind “how are you holding up?” check in.

From the bottom of my heart,

Thank-you 

 

Drop it Low

I’m going to be perfectly honest.  I have hit a wall today where I am beyond exhausted. I’ve spend the majority of the day sleeping during and after chemo. SO I’m going to keep this short and sweet:

CA-125 decreased from 455 to 337 !!!!!!

Chin Up, Spirits High

The “busy season” in advising is both exciting and draining leaving me pretty pooped by the end of the week. Today at chemo I will typically fall asleep through most of it once the Benadryl hits my veins. This time I totally passed out BEFORE the pharmacy even approved my blood work. Legitimately I arrived, got situated, Rosa accessed my port and hooked me up to saline while we waited for the green light from pharmacy to let us proceed with pre-drugs/chemo and I was totally out.

It’s just as well since the cable at he hospital has switched up their programming from Law and Order SVU to Law and Order Criminal Intent on not one, but TWO channels. I might need to write an angry letter. Scratch that, write a kind letter and play the cancer card. If there is a time to use the c-card, this is it!

It’s okay detective Tutuola, I’ll forgive.

Anyway, the infusion went fine and I just slept and slept. I actually slept so much I forgot to ask Rosa what my new CA-125 results were!

When I got home I crawled into bed and texted the ever reliable Sheila: “I was such a sleepy head today I didn’t even ask Rosa about my blood work. What’s the verdict dude?” I dropped my phone onto the bed next to me, buried my head in pillows and blankets and proceeded to pass out for another hour.

I awoke to about 14 missed texts, mainly from an excitable Sheila Enderby.

It turns out that my CA-125 has DECREASED from 742 to 455!!!

I haven’t had a CA-125 this low in well over a year and half or more. In fact I never had a CA-125 below 995 through the duration of the MEK inhibitor clinical trial at Mass General.

Here is a nice little recap, thank you Roger Williams for the 8 am required “Intro to Excel” course that made this half-assed graph possible:

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I have had so many days where I have had doubts and concerns. Perhaps in the future I will pursue a revolutionary new treatment that could obliterate the existing cancer but for now I am so pleased to see some REAL progress. Numbers that may reflect moving in a more positive direction.

I am so grateful to start off this next cycle with a bang. If you work at Women and Infants hospital and reading this- be forewarned that you’re going to be getting mega hugs (Heather- I already told Sheila that you get TWO, just ’cause).

Also- this is kind of an after thought but for my friends undergoing Taxol treatment PLEASE listen to your nutritionist and take L-Glutamine 3x per day. I started to feel some neuropathy come on (loss of feeling in hands/feet/fingers/toes) and since starting Glutamine I can already feel the impact! If this is a healthy choice for your body and approved by your doctor/nutritionist please go for it.

Anyway, that is all I have got for today.

Have a great weekend everyone!

Tired & Wired

It’s possible that I’m still recovering from the excitement of the Izzy Gala and NOCC walk and that was almost two weeks ago. I don’t think my body has quite caught up. I have had another round of chemo since and feel perpetually tired and amped up all at the same time.

Sleeping well has been challenging for a combination of reasons. I lay in bed thinking about what I need to do that next day at work, what chores sit undone, what I’m going to eat, treatment schedules, how the new season of Empire will unfold, my hopes, my dreams, my goals… Over and over and over I have these rapid fire thoughts until I finally fall asleep. My weird dreams take over from this point. It’s as if there is a dreamland director saying: “Okay folks, I’ll take it from here. Okay Sam and Diane from Cheers, are you here? GOOD. I need you to make an unexplained appearance in the chemo unit while Jess panics to review a degree audit for a student before the Hamburglar enters the room to stuff Pad Thai in her socks.”

Okay, that’s totally made up but if you’ve ever had a stress dream you get the gist of how you feel when you wake up- totally and utterly unrested.I t’s not that I am even “stressed” in a negative sense, just rapidly thinking. On top of the endless thoughts, eternal acid reflux wakes me up roughly 3-4 times per night.

The reflux should subside soon because Dr. Robison agreed to switch me back to Omeprazole. If anyone reading this suffers from chronic heart burn listen up. YOU NEED THIS IN YOUR LIFE. Omeprazole is a medication that has been sent down from the heavens on a silver platter by actual angels. Your life will change and soon mine will too. If I’m going to have insane stress dreams, without reflux I’ll at least be more likely to ride out the madness until morning.

It is clear that I have quite a bit going on and need to work on quieting my mind before bed. I know what works for me: Hot shower/bath + chamomile tea + no electronics at least 30 minutes before bed + a  Sleep Sonic CD to drift off to = Slam dunk. The key is doing this every night. I’ve had my tea so far tonight so it’s a start.

Aside from regulating sleep and managing fatigue, things are actually pretty good right now. Actually, being the medical anomaly that I am, some odd things are happening to my benefit…

Despite lingering soreness, I am pretty sure that my fingernails have stopped lifting. There was a point over the summer where I couldn’t even scratch my head for fear of losing a nail. Despite the discoloration (they’ve turned blue/black/green/gross) they feel stronger. Why? No effing clue. Not questioning it. Additionally, my hair is growing back! All of it! Even the chunks that totally fell out earlier in the summer. I’m looking forward to growing out my locks again. Hopefully in a few weeks I’ll feel comfortable enough go sans hat to work!

Over dinner last night I told Sheila about these strange occurrences and half-jokingly asked her if they are swapping out Taxol with a placebo. That was answered with an emphatic “NO”. So again, I’ll just be happy that my hair and nails are pulling through and not ask questions.

Final report of the evening is my personal favorite!

At work I have the great fortune of interacting with college students every single day. Every one of them unique, passionate, and engaged in their own way. It is my greatest joy to see students develop as each semester passes. It’s nearly impossible not to feel connected to many of these young adults as their undergraduate advisor.

As of this week, I get to experience that connectedness in a different capacity (don’t worry I’m not changing jobs!). Bryant’s Colleges Against Cancer has approached me to co-advise their club with the magnificent Amanda McGrath. I couldn’t be more excited to use this crummy experience and channel that energy into a campus community that has served me so well through this difficult time.

I’ll chalk that up to another cancer silver lining 🙂

I hope everyone is having a wonderful week. I’m off to fend off some more stress dreams. G’night and continued gratitude.

SO many updates (and lots of pictures!)

Wow, so much to recap. I haven’t been in a writing mood as of late, which is uncharacteristic of me. As of late I have been incredibly fatigued so any free chance to just zone out and rest is usually spent in front of Netflix or a book.

California Trip:

This is VERY late but I first want to talk about the trip that I took to California a couple weeks ago to visit my brother and his “west coast family”. I was in San Jose for 5 days and I would say that it was the most relaxed and zen I have been in months. My brother, his beautiful girlfriend Lacey, and his friends went out of their way to make sure that I had the best experience possible. I felt like an absolute princess.

Adam’s house, first of all, is gorgeous. I am so proud of this milestone in his life. Also- check out this guest room! (deco credit actually goes to his girlfriend since Adam may or may not have had a minor Bed, Bath and Beyond meltdown)

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We really packed in the activities! Adam was sure to take Lacey and I to one of my favorite restaurants in Capitola, Shadowbrook Restaurant. As seen below (in a picture borrowed from the Shadowbrook website) the restaurant is situated on a steep hill and there is a cable car that can take you down to the restaurant. The food is amazing and we feasted on lobster, scallops, steak, and wine. We were also laughing so hard the entire night (mostly due to my brother’s corny temperature jokes) that we were incapable of taking a normal picture.

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In addition to an extravagant dinner I was also treated to club seats at the Giants v. Cardinals game the next day in San Francisco (thanks to Lacey’s company). The weather was beautiful and we had a blast together. I cannot imagine a more beautiful stadium. Baseball to your left, sailboats to your right, hot dog down the gullet.

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The next day was pretty laid back. Adam’s adopted family Tina and Sumi hosted a seafood boil at their house. So the vast majority of the day was spent lounging in the pool and eating our weight in crab, shrimp, corn, potatoes, and other delights.

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My last full day was sadly spent without my brother since he was busy being a star athlete/drunk person babysitter at a charity golf tournament. His girlfriend was kind enough to take the day off from work to keep me company. I’m pretty sure our terrific lady day surpassed Adam’s golf tourney. We had lunch, got massages, and had a glass of vino in an open air wine bar in Santana Row. Lacey made sure that my last day was entertaining and memorable. I don’t think I stopped laughing the entire day.

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All activities aside some of my favorite parts of the trip were simply spending silly moments with my brother whether it be driving in the car or watching garbage tv in our jammies. We live over 3000 miles apart but our relationship as siblings is always loving and steady. The majority of our time was spent joking, laughing, and watching old WWF Royal Rumbles from the 1990’s (no joke- amazing). I will admit I had one small vulnerable moment when I was reflecting on my health challenges and Adam stopped, gave me a bear hug, and reassured me that I was doing better than I feel I am in the moment. I couldn’t ask for a better sibling, friend, and personal comedian.

I want to thank EVERYONE on the west coast that came out to visit, took time out from their busy schedules for outings, and made sure I was happy and comfortable.

Coming home was challenging. Internally I left Adam’s car and entered the San Jose airport kicking and screaming.

Favata-Farrell Wedding:

The weekend following vacation was another busy one. Sam Favata (my longtime friend, Cory’s Sigma Nu brother, and the person responsible for introducing me to Cory) married his college sweetheart, Alicia. The wedding was a blast! Alicia and Sam couldn’t possibly look happier. The music was amazing and as a result my feet were super swollen the next day from endless dancing.

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Congratulations Favata fam! I hope you are having a blast in St. Lucia!

Health Update:

So enough about recent activities. As you may remember from my previous entry my last blood test results were disappointing. Honestly, it upset me and I felt pretty down. It resulted in a frank conversation with my oncologist about expectations. The long and short of it is that I will be in some sort of treatment for the long haul. It doesn’t look like there will be an end to chemo anytime soon.

I had another blood test when I returned form Calfornia and not surprisingly (to me) it increased again. My last recorded CA-125 was 777.

777slider  Why can’t I get that lucky at Foxwoods?!

So the CA-125 was again not the most favorable but still didn’t go up enough to sound off any major alarms. We will stay the course with this treatment and only scan if it increases enough to cause concern for a third month in a row.

As my brother has reminded me- I cannot be a slave to the numbers and there are roughly a million reasons why it could have increased including the week off from chemo that I had for vacation (which I think was MUCH better for my soul and quite necessary). Again, disappointing news but it wasn’t my undoing this week. Let’s just hope for some sign, ANY sign, that we are moving in the right direction next month.

Other than test results I can report feeling extremely tired all the time. Much can be attributed to a combination of chemo, a high-volume time at work, travel, and what not. Every day this week (except for last night) I passed out on the couch for at least an hour after work before I could even make dinner. Last night I had steroids in me (a Taxol pre-drug) so I have unfortunately been awake for 26 hours and counting…

Everyone cringes when I talk about my fingernails but they are still incredibly sore. It can be best described as similar to the feeling of “the aftermath” of shutting your fingers in a drawer. What has helped tremendously is nightly soaking my nails in warm salt water, keeping them painted to hide the disgusting discoloration, keeping them short so they don’t catch on anything, and wearing rubber dish gloves while I wash dishes or clean my apartment. So far I have all 20 nails in tact. Fingers crossed, they stay where they belong.

2015 NOCC Walk:

We are 15 days away from the 2015 National Ovarian Cancer Coalition walk in Roger Williams park, Providence, RI. So far, thanks to your love and generosity, I have raised $1070 dollars!!!! This is amazing.

I also have an amazing team for the day of the walk. Thank you to those that have signed up so far: Stack Goldman, Michelle Fabs, Sarah Breen, Emily Nason, Kelly Blessing, and Brian Eastman! It is not too late to join this rag-tag group of misfits! If you would like to walk with us on Sunday, September 27th at 9:30am there is still plenty of time to sign up online through my donation page.

To those of you that have donated or shared my donation page, my heart is VERY full. Thank you SO much for your kindness. You have no idea how your donations will help to improve the lives and care of women like myself.

NOCC Walk- Jessica’s Personal Donation Page

I hope everyone has a great week 🙂

“…good news and bad news are often relative to your expectations”

*Dramatic SIGH* I won’t lie to you friends, I have been having a tough couple of weeks. Part physical, part emotional, there has been a fair bit of annoyances/disappointments to process. Yesterday I went in for my weekly treatment. This … Continue reading

“She is BALD, Jerry”

I will preface this entry by saying that I am fresh off of chemo this morning and still feeling the Benadryl haze. I typically try not write the same day I receive chemo. My fear is perceiving that I am … Continue reading

“Your stars will realign and things will get a little bit better”

I read this article in Cosmopolitan a few days ago (thanks Mom!): I Have Cancer…And It Sucks by 25-year old Deanna Pai, Cosmo Beauty Editor. Go ahead, it’s a quick read. I’ll wait… Crib notes for lazy bones: Deanna is young, has … Continue reading